Hollywood Antic (Total Recall, 2012)

Thinking over what the movie Total Recall is trying to convey aside from the apparent facts that Kate Beckinsale is a goddess dressed as mortal and Colin Farrell is strangely talented capable of portraying as kick-ass futuristic fugitive and melancholic Irish fisherman while maintaining the same facial expression, it strucked me how the viewers, me included, has become humanoids singing in chorus "yes my lady, no my lady, three bags full".

Film has dramatically evolved as tool of influence since the time The Arrival of the Train awed the living souls of yesteryears. From just merely playing with our imagination, it has already infiltrated the very personal recesses of the viewing public by validating personal desires and idealism and played it in either manner of arrogant intelligence or utter carelessness.

In this specific movie, Hollywood, for a hundredth times, playfully created a world where a person's deepest "what ifs" is actually the reality. This time, there are no fairygodmother or long lost billionaire grannies to bring the dream to life. A man-made machine is already in the scene backed up by scientific innuendos  of chemical transfusion. To pump up the scenario, bring in flying cars, hour-long chases, and romantic personal battles between truth and delusion, strength and compassion. The latter is always a fail safe formula that would, in most cases, convince the regular viewer that the script is deep, moving and multilayered. It made them feel good having judged the movie with 4 stars.

In the end, it was again a success for the capitalist to feed the self-entitled egos of the masses.

lyrics; glitter in the air

Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands 

Closed your eyes and trusted 

Just trusted  

Have you ever thrown a fistfull of glitter in the air 

Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, "I just don't care"  

It's only half past the point of no return 

The tip of the iceberg 

The sun before the burn 

The thunder before the lightning 

The breath before the phrase 

Have you ever felt this way  

Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone 

Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone  

Have you ever been touched so gently you had to cry 

Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside  

It's only half past the point of oblivion 

The hourglass on the table 

The walk before the run 

The breath before the kiss and the fear before the flames 

Have you ever felt this way  

La la la la La la la la  

There you are 

Sitting in the garden 

Clutching my coffee 

Calling me sugar 

You called me sugar 

Oh Oh No No No  

Have you ever wished for an endless night 

Lassoed the moon and the stars 

And pulled that rope tight  

Have you ever held your breath 

And asked yourself, "Will it ever get better than tonight 

Tonight"

THANK YOU, P!NK!

just a warmth

Warmth
human warmth

i don't really need to touch you
you don't really need to touch me

you're mere presence would suffice
just stay there

stay there and just listen
or pretend that you're listening

i just want to talk
talk and be heard

i can be petty
my thoughts can be very trivial
i couldn't care less
you shouldn't care less
can you pretend that you couldn't care less?

life alone is lonely
thought it was fun
thought it would make me man

but no

empty is more like it
addicted to self-pity
and selfishness becomes your dinner

alone, i don't want to be anymore
friends, family, I plea to all of you

and you
you
you who is everything I can't be
you whose embrace is my ecstasy

be here
seat beside me
talk to me
listen to me

hear you, i want
feel you, i need

let's share each others lives
let's make it one

i can't wait for you
though I'll kill myself with the pains of patience

happiness ambassador

The night during the day I decided to embark on this challenge, I decided not to push through with this. Why? Because my Starbucks organizer disappointed me. I planned to make it as my Book of Salamat, a record of thank-yous I received, only to find out that its on a calendar format.

What's up with that!

But in some ways, I was able to sober up from this petty dilemma -- i decided to go on and just use this blog to temporarily be my "book" of salamat.

The saddest part of my life. *eyeroll*

Anyways, for five days, I received two salamats from two different people. One was through an email, the other was through YM. *wide smile*

Though there were several thank-yous I received, these were the only salamats that qualified to be recorded in my book. Talk about standards.

Oh crap! There is nothing else I could say.

Wait, there's one.

I'm missing someone very badly. But I'm still thankful coz I know he will be coming back.

*********
8th salamat:
From: Gimo
Date: 12 July 2009
Reason: For being a listening friend.

9th salamat:
From: Kaye
Date: 13 July 2010
Reason: For being the first one to pay the badminton dues

first bang

As I was asked to write my life's goal, I couldn't think of anything specific. And i never wanted to write the obvious picks (e.i., house, family, jet-setting career). I'm in an enigmatic state. And I wanted to drive myself towards a new direction. What do i wanted to do? What do I wanted to see? What do I wanted to hear?

to hear.

yes, that's it.

to hear.

words from the mouth of the sincere -- nothing would beat that.

And since i've had enough of "i love you" -- not that i've received too many of it, its just that i find it too emotional for my system to appreciate -- im thinking of trying a less cliche line.

In line with my ultimate dream of being an ambassador for peace of this world, i needed to hear something that would give me reasons to be more of a human than a hyena.

Challenge: collect "Thank You's" from different people
Target: 1,000,000
Duration: lifetime
Criteria: to be decided as the challenge progresses

With my Starbucks organizer to serve as my Book of Salamat, i am to record all the "thanks you's" i'll be getting from different people who'm i'll have interaction with -- personal or virtual or by any means.

This is going to be a start of my new gratitude-filled life. To hell with you complaints!

******************************
Upon declaration of this planned challenge, I instantly got my first 7 TYs c/o my officemates.

7 Down -- 999,993 more to go